Lucky / Unlucky

I am not feeling very good these few weeks, and drink quite a bit. I was lucky enough to win an extra red pockets in the lucky draw during the group's BBQ tonight. Still, I drank half a bottle of red wine. This isn't the way out, I need someone to talk to.

Called a few friends. If not busy with working, it has to be busy with study. All of them are unavailable. It would be nice if I can have a tea with my ex, but she seems hasn't online for a while. What embarassed me was the answer from one of my friend. If you think it's better for you to keep it this way, I'd respect your decision.

Sometimes I think, will there be someone willing to listen to me as if I'm willing to listen to her? Probably I'm just unlucky, yet. Or am I really a 衰人 (bad guy)?